My friend's husband recently got a new truck. One of the features is the navigation system. A friendly voice maps out the route and tells him where he needs to turn. My friend calls the navigation system voice, "Iko". It's funny to want to be more like a "digital voice" but after what my friend told me, I realized that's exactly who I aspire to be.
When they go for a drive, Iko patiently tells the driver where to turn based on the route that has been mapped. If a "mistake" is made and you miss turning where you are supposed to, Iko comes on in a pleasant voice saying, "Re-calculating route." That's it! Not, "You idiot - how many times did I tell you the turn off was coming up and you missed it - are you blind?" No coming in with past grievances like, "You did this the last time we had to go here, how can you get it wrong every time." No taking advantage of the situation to add insult to injury by saying, "Men really can't multi-task. I knew that chewing gum would distract you."
It's really quite amazing. Iko doesn't get personal. In fact, she makes it sound like missing the turn-off is a good thing. "Let's re-calculate the route and go on an adventure together." There isn't a frantic search for the map with two people screaming at each other blaming the other for missing the turn-off - "YOU were supposed to be looking, I'm driving!" Iko doesn't get flustered because you are already late for your engagement, she calmly lets you know that in fact, there is another route to be taken. You can hear her soothing voice implying that it's okay, you are in good hands and you will get there. Don't worry, be happy!
Maybe this is sounding a little too much like the "Stepford Wives", but I have to admit, I would like to be able to react like this more often. It doesn't make sense to take these things personally and start an argument over them. I think Iko is on to something. Why am I bringing in the past into a present situation? Why am I not seeing the opportunity for discovery in going a different way? Why am I not finding the joy in the gift of the journey and instead focusing on the destination? Why am I in such a hurry, because as a famous song says, "all we really have to do is live and die".
About four weeks ago I went for a run on the trail. All the leaves on the trees had died and fallen off and we had already had a light snowfall that had come and melted. As I ran I came across one tree with all its' withered, dried, dead leaves still clinging to the branches. I had to stop and take a picture. I realized that it was telling me something very important. The tree wouldn't let go of the leaves even though they were dead and no longer viable. High winds, cold, rain, frost and snow had been unable to dislodge these leaves from the tree even though the tree was exposed to all the elements. I wondered about that as I continued my run. Why hadn't the leaves fallen? What was keeping them attached to the tree after they were no longer useful? Why weren't they decaying on the ground and providing nourishment for the soil or protection for small bugs and rodents? I wondered at how much energy the tree needed to use to "hold" on to these dead leaves. I wondered if the leaves had died with some kind of "scar tissue" that attached itself to the tree and the tree just couldn't shed them. I wondered if that would affect the tree's ability to survive the winter, if this energy used to keep the leaves would compromise the tree's immune system.
As I pondered this I realized that it was sending me a message about my life. How much energy am I using holding on to past hurts and slights to my ego? Why wasn't I letting them go? What kind of a hold did they have on me or was I the one holding on? How was it compromising my ability to let my inner light of God shine? How do I relate to those I love while holding on to all of these "dead" issues?
I do want to be more like Iko. I want to embrace the moment and see the moment as the best place to be, full of hope, full of possibilities, full of light, full of adventure, full of love. I want to re-calculate the route when things go off course and together find a new path that opens up our eyes to the beauty life has to offer. I want to meet each moment with "new" eyes, ones that aren't holding on to past hurts. It won't be without challenges, but as Iko expresses, we can face these challenges, find a new route to discover and let life unfold in all its splendour.